tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-157556112011-12-09T14:02:21.108-07:00I write humor. That means I find bizarre sh*t funny.M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.comBlogger4171100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-79569383976416664652011-12-09T13:54:00.001-07:002011-12-09T14:02:21.117-07:00

...you watch an edition of The Colbert Report and see something about this:  Parents Warned About Mail Order Chicken Pox Lollipops What's more nuts: 1) That moms would mail other moms disease-ridden treats? or; 2) That recipients would need to be advised they might not want to give the germ-laced goodies to their offspring?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-73122815732278089042011-05-21T16:00:00.003-07:002011-05-21T16:06:15.454-07:00

Of course, I bought the MP3. I mean, just LISTEN to them.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-19307129002489388522011-05-02T17:31:00.001-07:002011-05-02T17:33:18.087-07:00

Surely it'd be of scientific interest to learn how he lived with neither heart nor conscience.Good. Riddance.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-25208526046041674032011-04-13T23:06:00.005-07:002011-04-13T23:20:03.812-07:00

August 2008Re: Discovery proceedings regarding the Guardianship petition of My Alzheimer’s Stricken Mother, an alleged incapacitated individual.Dear Ms. Maboobski:Thank you for the copies of the three financial documents my youngest sibling claims are all that he found within my very dead and somewhat well-heeled father’s records. Please note that two of those documents, rather large checks

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-69765716267331857802011-04-03T19:22:00.002-07:002011-04-03T19:27:46.247-07:00

What's to eat? After a week in Tahoe and all those hours in the car, NOBODY was into doing anything about dinner. Ever resourceful, this writer pulled a trusty pouch of proscuitto from her private stock, then sent the hungry hordes out to the garden to pick their favorite lettuces to wrap it therein.Best part? No dishes.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-209001849323260492011-03-31T11:09:00.003-07:002011-03-31T11:27:04.080-07:00

I have an organic garden, so my garden trowel trembled to see this deal. Seeds of Change is offering 25 packets of free, organic seeds for a total of $4.99 in shipping charges. You can't pick the seeds and you'll have to wait two to four weeks for them to arrive. Judging from what The Weather Channel tells me, that's fine for those of you in snow-packed parts of the country, and plenty of time

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-83391956138196234512011-03-13T14:20:00.003-07:002011-03-13T14:31:55.388-07:00

Just read this on Fox News:Dozens of countries have offered assistance. Two U.S. aircraft carrier groups were off Japan's coast and ready to provide assistance. Helicopters were flying from one of the carriers, the USS Ronald Reagan, delivering food and water in Miyagi.Two other U.S. rescue teams of 72 personnel each and rescue dogs arrived Sunday, as did a five-dog team from Singapore.Can

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-76200758351663704312011-02-03T13:06:00.002-07:002011-02-03T13:25:43.891-07:00

Growing my own has spoiled me. I expect all my produce to have that 'just picked' taste - fresh, crisp, with just a hint of the garden dirt I'm too lazy to wash off.We like blueberries in this house. We time our trips to New Jersey to coincide with blueberry picking season in Hammonton. I understand my husband's craving for that taste of summer, especially as winter's bite lingers even here in

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-7908056378557482652011-01-13T15:43:00.006-07:002011-01-13T16:04:46.909-07:00

Your eyes do not deceive you. That's a clothesline. My clothesline. The green stuff hanging from it? Organically grown Bok Choy from my out-of-control garden.You're incredulous, aren't you? I mean, who has a clothesline?I do. Along with cotton, citrus, cattle, and copper, AND, if national cable news is to be believed - guns, drop houses and regular shoot outs along the border - Arizona has plenty

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-29531121538668862342011-01-05T11:09:00.002-07:002011-01-05T11:38:08.011-07:00

Plant seeds, stuff grows. Who knew? Question is, what to do with all the green?Much as the denizens of Casa di Tarquini love salad, limited as we are to 24-hour days, our ability to crunch through the garden's current production proves overwhelming. Lasagna can only hold so much bok choy, parsley garnish only so much pasta, and I'm too damned lazy to bag it up for the neighbors.Time to break out

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-59022711952900797882010-11-16T15:35:00.003-07:002010-11-16T15:45:59.825-07:00

Last night I dreamed my husband quit his job to open a sandwich shop - in Chester, Pennsylvania."Are you making any money?" I asked."No," he said."But our roof leaks," I pleaded. "And the children! There's college!""Of what importance are roofs (rooves?) and college educations when one is following his passion?" My husband retorted. As if to prove his point, he executed a plateful of perfectly

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-46436263150530597632010-11-13T10:39:00.007-07:002010-11-13T14:47:01.660-07:00

I've never gardened catawampus before. In Phoenix, summers are hellish followed by spring, then fall, then spring again. Winter never arrives except on the occasional local mountaintop. The soil is poor, alkaline and non-porous, so tough to dig, bodies are best dumped in the desert, rather than buried in the backyard. So my gardeners raised the planting beds. They trucked in soil, rearranged the

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-78182266715099015262010-11-09T16:03:00.002-07:002010-11-09T16:18:27.583-07:00

This year, we decided to curb our dependence on Monsanto and Archers Daniels Midland by installing an edible landscape. The backyard was a pit, filled with sand and rock and the occasional mesquite tree. We had to landscape anyway, so why not toss a few tomatoes into the mix? Being Italian, a few peppers, some eggplant, a little basil, maybe some oregano, dill, cilantro, thyme, rosemary, garlic,

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-58457311428545953612010-10-29T18:47:00.010-07:002010-10-29T19:29:08.351-07:00

Gosh! This mid-term election is SUCH a quandary!Do I vote for the guy who plans to backrupt my state or the gal who hopes to repeal the constitution?Who better reflects my family's values and beliefs? The dude determined to dismantle our liberties, or the devious dame with the deviant business dealings?Hmmm...Stalin or Hitler? Kitten Kicker or Puppy Beater?What shall I do?What shall I do?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-48893115186451177972010-10-27T15:00:00.010-07:002010-10-27T15:34:18.919-07:00

My favorite exhibit is Culinary Arts, an apt name lest any mistake this cake for a burger and fries. Even the dipping sauce is best served for dessert.I wonder, would my own homemade bread be ribbon-worthy?Could I can a good that would tower above these?And am I alone in thinking this is a great serving solution for when the kids bring their friends home for snacks?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-6852257398023918952010-10-08T15:48:00.009-07:002010-10-08T16:32:02.320-07:00

Ancestry.com has this really cool new feature. I click the button and it tells me the exact relationship of a person in my family tree to me. For example, tonight while chatting with the 1st Great grand Niece of the Husband of My Husband's Grand Aunt, I got an email from the Grand niece of the Husband of a Grand Aunt regarding a planned visit with a Nephew of the Husband of the Grand Aunt.And his

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-72012547830760662642010-09-20T21:44:00.003-07:002010-09-20T21:52:49.618-07:00

My husband is a talented photographer - a talented amateur photographer. In his off hours I'll often finding him stalking hornworms on our tomato plants, catching hummingbirds mid-flight, or turning everyday objects into high-art. Tonight, Jupiter is closer to our lonely little planet than it has been in decades, so my husband stepped outside our front door, turned his lens to the night sky and

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-8171355930180019812010-08-23T13:03:00.004-07:002010-08-23T13:11:43.610-07:00

In my continuing quest for Ancestral Accuracy, I had a nice long talk with my zio re: cugini and cannoli, paisano and pesto, bar fights and broken heads, vendettas and vixens, la dolce vita and il documentos dodgy...No wonder my parents moved us to the suburbs.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-16587890961909588032010-08-18T13:29:00.006-07:002010-08-19T00:17:08.510-07:00

That's gonna be the title of my third book, maybe my fourth, maybe even my second. (Film rights available, contact my agent.) It will be the gripping tale of a Northern Suburbs of Philadelphia Gal's search for relatives one branch at a time over at Ancestry.com.Here's what I've realized so far:1) We're all still from the same four regions of the mezzogiorno, and;2) Most of us still mentally

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-8948156714604839002010-08-15T22:28:00.013-07:002010-08-15T23:25:26.824-07:00

Section 8: How to Record the Sociopathic SiblingMake this:Use this:And POOF!Like he never, ever really happened.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-34626374832143357092010-08-07T13:40:00.007-07:002010-08-07T14:29:47.207-07:00

Been spending time on The World's Biggest Time Suck, aka Ancestry.com. So far, everybody in my tree comes from the same 4 villages in various regions of the mezzogiorno.Which makes me my own third cousin.Twice removed.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-32968111762388365402010-08-02T15:12:00.003-07:002010-08-02T15:18:45.611-07:00

I got the Montgomery County Orphan's Court ripping the heart from my chest.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-49864051194512851962010-07-29T20:29:00.005-07:002010-07-29T21:10:03.493-07:00

I was wandering our local survivalist shop today and I came upon a bag of 'Whole Grain Teff'.Teff?Turns out Teff is tops in Ethiopia."It's their mainstay food crop," the clerk tells me."What's it doing here?" I ask, mostly because Ethiopia doesn't hit me as the kind of country with a lot of food to spare.It's here because there's a guy in Idaho growing it just as fast as he can. Or maybe the guy

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-57213593774234838602010-07-27T20:00:00.005-07:002010-07-27T20:25:41.805-07:00

Elderly? Alzheimer’s? Got a nice chunky estate? And a properly executed Durable Power of Attorney designating a trusted and beloved elder daughter to care for it and you?The Orphan’s Court in Montgomery County, Pennsylvania won’t uphold it. To your court-appointed attorney and your court-appointed guardians, as well as your chronically-unemployed and morally-vacant eldest and youngest sons, your

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-47623486042884463812010-07-19T18:53:00.003-07:002010-07-19T19:06:22.850-07:00

Today, the kids and I tried our hand at making fresh whole wheat pasta for the very first time. I mean like from flour. Like from flour we actually ground ourselves from wheat berries. We doused it with pesto made with basil from our garden.It was delicious.We now have the satisfaction of knowing our diets will not suffer when the Zombie Apocalypse happens.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-87994711010660965322010-06-18T12:32:00.001-07:002010-06-18T12:34:01.313-07:00

Click the link. Really. Just click the link:http://www.flixxy.com/lucky-day.htm

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-78981788050774967442010-05-24T10:50:00.002-07:002010-05-24T10:53:10.856-07:00

They should have titled this show CONFUSED.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-67904411067684681112010-05-18T11:41:00.002-07:002010-05-18T11:44:53.812-07:00

Don't ask me where E. Ann Bardawill gets it from. Just enjoy.And put down beverages.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-58046676807755961502009-12-24T22:46:00.001-07:002009-12-24T22:46:32.300-07:00

Festivus Maximus, y'all.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-83076746867802983672009-11-27T15:57:00.002-07:002009-11-27T16:11:07.991-07:00

How meaningful can any social network be when one claims to be following 560 people? Or is followed by 1,735? Attempts to keep a social network to just business, or just family, at least by this solitary and somewhat socially inept writer, prove more time-consuming and cumbersome than doing a tax return. I'd rather share chunky, occasional emails to rapidfire updates. Look for me there. Or here.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-83936576575640813712009-11-16T15:06:00.002-07:002009-11-16T15:16:50.629-07:00

I bought FiestaWare.Tangerine, Lemongrass, Scarlet, Sunflower.It glows.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-13065913372905225072009-11-05T10:21:00.004-07:002009-11-05T10:32:51.863-07:00

The July/August 2009 issue.(I was recycling old magazines)(Don't ask.)

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-18346775835101679192009-10-14T20:47:00.004-07:002009-10-14T21:16:17.682-07:00

Besides, grandma's old. What's she gonna do with it?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-9271379225671899512009-10-07T11:56:00.005-07:002009-10-07T12:08:47.882-07:00

Should I worry?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-57527155137814761202009-10-02T12:11:00.003-07:002009-10-02T12:13:57.265-07:00

1) clear paper clutter from kitchen table2) No, seriously. Do this.3) Just pick up the stupid paper and go to it.4) At least put the trash in recycling.5) And the bills you need to pay in a box.6) Just put anything that isn't trash in the box, the trash in the trash and7) the magazines in the bathroom.8) Never mind, just put the magazines in the trash and the books in the bookcase.9) Forget the

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-66838898135733105872009-09-27T03:37:00.004-07:002009-09-27T03:56:17.838-07:00

This is how it goes. A gamble, a Google, a glimmer of insight.Cold enchiladas and warm beer. After hours napping, understated moping.Jorge taps a finger to Jose's fevered brow. "Yo. Amigo. Snap out of it."Jose doesn't answer. He can't. He has to do it again. Just one more time. Change a verb here, nudge a preposition there, remove that line, add this one. Again and again and again, each effort

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-36587359837220970052009-09-09T22:31:00.005-07:002009-09-09T23:09:08.868-07:00

Pesky house bills getting you down? Too much month and not enough paycheck? You want the premium cable, but your budget limits you to peasantvision? Don't despair!You've got Mom's checkbook! Now you can afford all the things you know you deserve but don't want to work for.Mom won't notice.She has Alzheimer's.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-71820296262544614822009-09-02T09:39:00.004-07:002009-09-02T13:09:22.203-07:00

If you don't want your criminal brother to hold Mom hostage in her basement, make sure Dad gives you copies of all his estate planning/end of life documents before he dies.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-66632874641445655982009-08-17T22:52:00.001-07:002009-08-17T22:52:27.503-07:00

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-10380175439675648322009-08-14T12:53:00.006-07:002009-08-14T13:01:09.654-07:00

This article is particularly enlightening and provides a clear definition:http://www.apa.org/pi/aging/eldabuse.htmlParticularly disturbing is this paragraph:Elder abuse is the infliction of physical, emotional, or psychological harm on an older adult. Elder abuse also can take the form of financial exploitation or intentional or unintentional neglect of an older adult by the caregiver.My personal

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-78118231908890548242009-07-29T08:11:00.003-07:002009-07-29T08:35:23.382-07:00

Last night I dreamed people thought the world was coming to an end, so they fought over frozen hams, even going so far as to accost shoppers returning from Costco to get a hold of their horde.Upon awakening, I decided that while this was not an unreasonable, albeit non-kosher pre-apocalyptic scenario, the dream failed to provide any reason for this behavior. It didn't open with a mushroom cloud

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-21032177980573986612009-07-08T20:57:00.002-07:002009-07-08T21:04:37.074-07:00

Character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking. There are too many people who think that the only thing that's right is to get by, and the only thing that's wrong is to get caught. - J.C. Watts

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-46260249523569166442009-06-23T15:35:00.002-07:002009-06-23T15:37:52.585-07:00

Anybody who hasn't seen this movie yet should do so immediately.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-30513693076303199072009-05-24T22:31:00.004-07:002009-05-24T22:35:28.419-07:00

The green I contemplate painting my living room is the exact shade of Captain Kirk's shirt.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-12807501667279290092009-05-23T11:18:00.003-07:002009-05-23T11:23:37.941-07:00

How come Hollywood's ho-hum remake of the gritty classic wasn't called:The Postal Carrier Always Rings Twice??

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-91688612784962574492009-05-20T13:46:00.002-07:002009-05-20T13:50:00.318-07:00

Given a shopping list that consisted of:Van Camp's Pork and BeansBlueberriesCaptain MorganJosé Cuervohave I any business, at my age, to feel depressed that nobody ask for my I.D. nor questioned me regarding the Captain and José?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-71408055568870537392009-05-18T14:27:00.002-07:002009-05-18T14:30:15.108-07:00

Never, ever shake a container without first checking that the lid is held on tightly.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-54079763467164812082009-02-25T16:39:00.004-07:002009-02-25T16:46:59.695-07:00

THE list. The freaking New York TIMES list.#30.Holy Cannoli, Jamie Ford!! Congratulations!!!!Read The Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet. Read it.You'll love it.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-15548640209717083592009-01-12T18:52:00.001-07:002009-01-12T18:52:24.964-07:00

I admit it. I think this is cool.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-49197531421610349992009-01-09T10:57:00.001-07:002009-01-09T11:00:07.579-07:00

Does he have to wear a uniform?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-28789448007185344152009-01-01T10:56:00.006-07:002009-01-01T11:23:06.519-07:00

The only difference between French Toast with Bacon and Scrambled Eggs with Bacon is the syrup.And under the heading, Laugh My Ample Backside Off:

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-80288055426078907972008-12-15T18:37:00.003-07:002008-12-15T18:49:19.260-07:00

This is one of those Christmas stories each of us has the ability to give a happy ending.The Marine Corp needs a few good toys to make sure their wonderful Toys for Tots program can provide a toy for every child who needs one this holiday season. It's a hard economic year. Scratch that, it's a really sucky economic year for so many and those who'd normally give just can't. There's a lot of great

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-79326444688594160132008-11-21T11:17:00.004-07:002008-11-21T11:40:05.321-07:00

I've a Brand New Listing on my horrible incomplete link list. (Seriously, don't take it personally if you're not there. Lately, *I'm* hardly here. These days, I feel like I deserve an award for getting my bra hooked all the way up.)I've added Bibliophiles. This is for people who just love books. Some are readers only, some readers and writers and there will be more listings added, just as soon as

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-55088743254917802852008-11-12T17:00:00.001-07:002008-11-12T17:01:45.846-07:00

Dedicated to my HOA, which really needs something useful to do with their time:Worry less about your neighbor's weeds and more about your neighbor's needs.Thank you for your kind attention. You are now returned to this blog's typical sporadic posting.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-69077137156114587092008-10-30T17:54:00.001-07:002008-10-30T17:56:21.046-07:00

Just saying...International Conference on AD/HD: Starts November 12CHADD, the nation's largest organization serving people affectedby attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder, will hold itsinternational conference November 12-15 in Anaheim, California.Organizers promise one of the best conferences ever.This year's conference will feature the following:A keynote address by Olympic gold medalist

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-14003314255648441902008-10-24T09:39:00.004-07:002008-10-24T09:44:06.482-07:00

*rolls eyes*Scientists.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-27096485140686233972008-10-19T09:37:00.002-07:002008-10-19T09:42:15.903-07:00

Or, as Carl Jung explained it, meaningful coincidences.Loretta Ross' blog post about a site in her as-yet unpublished novel, THE REENACTMENT, may be more a case of meaningful research on the part of a political campaign, I like the possibility that it just sort of happened.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-29944124003000632072008-09-24T12:46:00.006-07:002008-09-24T18:25:08.731-07:00

The soon-to-be-famous YA author, Susan Adrian has a gut-splitting post about What Writers Can Talk to Each Other About at writers' conferences. Topic number two is POV. Susan says regarding this:POV is one of the great writer secrets. You don't even know what it IS until you accept that you are a writer (unless you were really paying attention in english class, but most of you were probably

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-3447747229768832752008-08-26T21:33:00.002-07:002008-08-26T21:38:27.705-07:00

I mean, really, how much worse could I do then what we currently got?A reserved and cautious THANK YOU to Bonnie Wren who needs to seriously consider getting a hobby.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-40888156799858642722008-08-25T15:19:00.003-07:002008-08-25T15:21:07.458-07:00

Wouldn't an essay contest be more appropriate?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-27927593263785835472008-08-14T10:01:00.004-07:002008-08-14T10:04:34.655-07:00

Doesn't it?Julia Child was a spy.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-81074490850550284052008-07-28T20:44:00.001-07:002008-07-28T20:45:50.382-07:00

Thanks! Ballpoint Wren!

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-25505427473849215602008-07-25T17:31:00.003-07:002008-12-12T23:34:14.636-07:00

Something funny AND tax-deductible...I'm even bringing a Bunion with me.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-51671408008943511622008-06-21T09:47:00.003-07:002008-12-12T23:34:14.835-07:00

I FINALLY read The Wind Done Gone.Damn.It's good.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-91892552011579370512008-05-19T21:46:00.001-07:002008-12-12T23:34:14.995-07:00

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-24284190839532665782008-05-14T08:56:00.003-07:002008-12-12T23:34:15.161-07:00

My friend, Sandra Ruttan sent me the first few chapters of this to read about a year ago. It grabbed me from the first sentence, swept me through the first chapter, then clobbered me on the head with a twist that I still think about and wonder what happened.Then Sandra did something very mean.She didn't send me anymore chapters.But I'll show her. I'm going HERE to order it from Amazon and then

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-39095333124411947602008-05-12T16:36:00.002-07:002008-05-12T16:38:57.455-07:00

Anybody who doesn't make a habit of reading Loretta Sue Ross' blog...really should.Put down beverages and go HERE.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-32990111884990616402008-04-30T12:56:00.006-07:002008-12-12T23:34:15.360-07:00

But signing a name only takes a second.A month or so ago, I forwarded some of you an email urging you to urge your representatives in congress to sign a letter in support of continuation of funding for Reading is Fundamental. (Run-on sentence alert!!)You can check HERE to see if your representatives were co-signers to the letter. The actual letters and signatures are HERE and HERE. (Senator

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-2042753442756204712008-04-28T08:43:00.002-07:002008-04-28T08:46:06.576-07:00

This is pretty much how I felt after watching last week's episode of Lost.See more funny videos at CollegeHumorThere's a meme I have to do that my friend, Sandra Ruttan tagged me for, but it requires more brain power than I can muster on a Monday morning.So, maybe tomorrow.Or the next day.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-43524589776392981752008-04-25T10:30:00.003-07:002008-12-12T23:34:15.544-07:00

The USDA assures me there is no rice shortage in the United States. This Sacramento paper parrots the same thing, but mentions that wild rice is in short supply because we're exporting a lot of it, which is kind of dumb to mention because wild rice isn't even rice it's a grain that grows on the banks of rivers and is pretty costly to harvest, which is why it usually turns up in mixes and not as a

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-42989468765004330852008-04-21T19:42:00.005-07:002008-04-21T19:54:04.086-07:00

How to handle Junior's questions reference the post-advance makeover.Brought to you by Michael Salzhauer, M.D. of Bal Harbour (but of course...) and those fun loving folks at Big Tent Books.Hmmm...any chance Dr. Salzhauer tosses the book in with the cost of a consult?Put down beverages and thank Dana Bunion for this link.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-84238757089217458592008-04-10T14:01:00.008-07:002008-12-12T23:34:15.822-07:00

As everybody knows, having an agent is beyond cool. You hand her your manuscript, make whatever spelling and punctuation changes she asks for, then go off on a European vacation while you wait for her to bring in the bucks.And if you've got an agent as cool as mine you don't mind if she has a few other pesky requirements, like including a plot, having the thing make sense from beginning to end,

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com31tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-53935475488439601662008-04-03T08:15:00.003-07:002008-12-12T23:34:15.955-07:00

Holly Kennedy did it again! The Silver Compass is available now. Holly's first two books were fun reads and I'm looking forward to sinking into a tub full of bubbles with Holly's new one. Thanks, Holly!

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-3511357553491972982008-04-01T21:14:00.004-07:002008-12-12T23:34:16.136-07:00

CNN will have coverage all day featuring lots of Sanjay Gupta.There's a wealth of information at the American Academy of Pediatrics website, also at the Autism Society of America's website.Why should you care? Because Autism now affects about 1 in every 150 children in this country. Because chances are you know somebody whose child has autism. Because knowledge is power. Because it's time to put

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-65973616814049254002008-03-29T19:28:00.002-07:002008-12-12T23:34:16.286-07:00

If you're undead, aren't you actually alive?

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-62728613331580927112008-03-29T09:20:00.001-07:002008-03-29T09:23:10.980-07:00

Kelly ParraAnd she got TWO noms - Best First Novel and Best Young Adult.Wow. I mean, just...wow.You go, Kelly!

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-74559332985119336072008-03-28T17:54:00.004-07:002008-03-28T17:57:51.972-07:00

From Publisher's Marketplace: "Lost Dog author Bill Cameron's CHASING SMOKE, in which the hero finds himself investigating four suspicious 'suicides' of men linked only by their doctor, who is also the hero's doctor while he struggles to recover from cancer, to Ben Leroy at Bleak House, in a nice deal, for publication in September 2008, by Janet Reid at FinePrint Literary Management."Bill's so

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-30482894886747740262008-03-27T13:29:00.002-07:002008-03-27T13:31:08.279-07:00

This very cool person explains it.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-11106796931653292552008-03-24T08:31:00.001-07:002008-03-24T08:32:59.121-07:00

File this one under:

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-4294278363936758412008-03-13T10:12:00.002-07:002008-12-12T23:34:16.571-07:00

The Sisters Grimm by Michael Buckley. Sent to them by my beauteous agent in an obvious attempt to foster lying, scamming, and diversionary tactics among the members of my family. Because that's what we are all resorting to in an effort to get a little uninterrupted read time on this thing. It's inventive, snappy and funny. Really, really funny. And y'all know how much I like funny.'Scuse me.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-10511123021612219632008-03-08T15:36:00.009-07:002008-12-12T23:34:17.160-07:00

And it's companion volume:Because most of us with Attention Deficit Disorder can't remember what we ate for breakfast much less what happened three decades ago.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-90870416056963071742008-03-04T08:59:00.002-07:002008-03-04T09:02:27.648-07:00

BecauseShe'sSoCool.Reacher fans, rejoice! There's a new boy in town.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-23093474207512350562008-03-03T12:07:00.005-07:002008-12-12T23:34:17.255-07:00

Well, that's not quite true. You need groceries and clothes and rent money and the six hundred pencils that your kid manages to lose from his or her school supplies every six days or so and health insurance and all kinds of other weird little and not so little things that keep body and soul together.So I'll send you HERE and HERE and let you count your blessings from there.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-4135580351955664112008-02-29T18:53:00.010-07:002008-12-12T23:34:18.407-07:00

Because I'm done my edits.For now.Party's over. Time to do my taxes.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-77440963745661033692008-02-24T13:51:00.005-07:002008-12-12T23:34:18.643-07:00

I had a scene about parking in HINDSIGHT. I pulled it because a lot of good writing gets sacrificed in pursuit of the perfect story flow. AETV must have sensed my soul-wrenching anguish because they made Parking Wars to soothe my spirit.It's like a dose of home all wrapped up in Caccia-roll goodness. Yeah, Caccia's rolls, from Caccia's Bakery in South Philly and a number of other

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-6606371494171423342008-02-19T15:46:00.003-07:002008-02-19T15:48:11.209-07:00

From Publisher's Marketplace:"Jaye Wells' RED-HEADED STEPCHILD, the story of a half-mage/half-vampire assassin with divided loyalties, to Devi Pillai at Orbit, in a good deal, for three books, for publication in Summer 2009, by Jonathan Lyons at Lyons Literary (world English)."Jaye's so cool.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-25464982237746662422008-02-12T19:07:00.000-07:002008-02-12T19:16:35.793-07:00

So my friend and most excellent Bunion, E. Ann Bardawill is a comic.Literally.Click the link. Now scroll down past the space lizard getting ready to shoot President Lincoln, past Plastic Farm, past Plastic Farm: Fertilizer...yep, there she is. The Lady in Red, her mug immortalized by Dave Sim under the very intriguing title, 'Cerebus Fans in Crisis'.That's right. Crisis.Fans of Cerebus, which is

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-27916869452487912702008-02-05T13:00:00.000-07:002008-12-12T23:34:19.076-07:00

Valentine's Day is still 9 days away, but Lent starts tomorrow. Better eat the chocolate now.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-63954650130486960602008-01-30T00:09:00.000-07:002008-01-30T00:22:26.554-07:00

I started to tell the person how I wrote a query and got asked for a partial and...then the person fell asleep because most people's tales of how they got their agents follow a similar kind of path ending with how they then got asked for a full, then they got a call and the agent loved and adored their work and would they sign with them and then they (cried, got excited, jumped up-and-down:

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-88662523068394257062008-01-29T06:34:00.001-07:002008-12-12T23:34:19.177-07:00

Political hoo-hah got you tense? Turn off the tube, flip off the computer, and pick up a good book, a tale of murder, betrayal, love, hate, marriage, friendship, illicit sex and over-scheduled teens.Yes, it's the paperback edition of The Liar's Diary by Patry Francis, a gal who's facility for language is outpaced only by her facility for friendship. I read the hardcover edition last year and

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-35049244966665906022008-01-27T16:38:00.000-07:002008-12-12T23:34:19.368-07:00

...in Phoenix.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-40638678876354495032008-01-22T13:55:00.000-07:002008-01-22T13:57:55.716-07:00

I just turned on CNBC.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-83499408975773915482008-01-20T10:47:00.000-07:002008-12-12T23:34:19.529-07:00

basilico - the Italian word for 'basil'.Basilica - Where the Pope says Mass.Both have the same Greek root referring to 'royal'. So a basilica isn't just a church. It's a super-duper ultra-special royal church. And basil's not just an herb. It's a royal herb, as anybody who's ever eaten a really good pesto can attest.The only thing separating 'pasta' and 'pesto' is a couple of vowels. Pasta is

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-88570193517983354052008-01-17T21:01:00.000-07:002008-12-12T23:34:19.704-07:00

So I go there and look up all my ancestors because I'm making a pilgrimage later in the year.None of them are from where they said they were which makes me wonder what they were actually up to.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-72213944861586992582008-01-14T10:03:00.000-07:002008-12-12T23:34:20.613-07:00

The Bunions have a blog.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-55854080173476385682008-01-10T21:20:00.000-07:002008-01-10T21:22:04.474-07:00

The long-lost and newly restored 1944 version of Lord of the Rings:Seriously...have a drink first. Have two.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-35997272778287701672008-01-02T18:57:00.001-07:002008-01-02T18:58:12.314-07:00

E. Ann Bardawill went shopping for that special something for New Year's Eve.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-10435450491087609462007-12-31T15:59:00.000-07:002007-12-31T16:01:30.776-07:00

No pictures. Blogger's being mean.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-33821254354104296532007-12-24T08:59:00.000-07:002007-12-24T09:00:06.766-07:00

Pray for peace.

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15755611.post-19260202593183490292007-12-19T21:16:00.001-07:002007-12-19T21:47:25.567-07:00

Wow. Remember 1985? Or was it 1984? Gosh, who cares? The Fall of Saigon had already faded into the history books, disco was dead, our hair was moussed, Michael Jackson still looked human and AIDS was only just starting to make its mark on the public psyche. What crack babies we knew about were mostly confined to Really Big City pediatric wards. The Berlin Wall was still up, the Chernobyl disaster

M. G. Tarquinihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02970872751327021013noreply@blogger.com6